The following procedure is recommended

When completing tasks or dealing with people, replace

  • the two extremes of right or wrong with the gradations
  • very good, good, satisfactory, sufficient, inadequate and insufficient.

Replacing the two extremes of right and wrong with gradations helps to reduce inner tension

Example - Perfect worlds

If you think of perfection, there are only two possibilities: right or wrong. Gradations and shades of gray are not used.

Practical application

  • Use gradations such as very good, good, satisfactory, sufficient, inadequate and insufficient.

The perfect elevator

Do you know an elevator that always takes you straight to the floor you want? That would be perfect! Or have you ever had to travel in the opposite direction? Could you live with it? If you always have to have everything perfect, you might think: Did the elevator have a defect? Wouldn’t it be better to take it out of service and use the stairs? Or is it not enough to reach the desired floor a few seconds later?

The perfect restaurant

Do you know a restaurant that serves either perfect or bad food? Sometimes it tastes good, sometimes very good. Maybe you are not satisfied sometimes. Would you then visit the restaurant again? Do you always expect to be served perfect food? When does a meal deserve an unsatisfactory rating? When the food is only slightly oversalted or only when the ingredients are spoiled?

The perfect disco

Do you know a disco where either only great songs or bad songs are played? Is the mix of songs usually not good to satisfactory, and on some days even sufficient? Is that why the disc jockey is bad? Should he be fired? Will you visit the discotheque again, even if you know that your favorite song might not be played? And if a birthday song is played, should the operator’s license be revoked or would the evening still be satisfactory for you?

The perfect relationship

Have you ever been in a relationship where the couple either always loves each other or always hates each other? Aren’t there days when you sometimes get on better and sometimes worse? Is that enough for a good relationship or is it not better to break up immediately after an argument? Is there a way for us to look perfect when we wake up in the morning? And if not, have we failed? Are a sleepy expression or unkempt hair inadequate to insufficient and a reason for breaking up?

The perfect dancer

Have you ever stepped on your dance partner’s foot? Have you failed as a dancer and should leave the dance floor? Should you give up dancing altogether? Are you always in the same form when dancing or do you sometimes do better and sometimes worse? Can watching others dance be enough? Does your personal dance style always have to look perfect? Can you still dance well with ski boots on your feet?

Perfect performance

Do you always have to perform perfectly and be fully focused? And if you are not well-rested, will you fail at work or fail with the task? Does it make sense to start a job even if you cannot guarantee that you will always perform perfectly? And if the boss likes your work or praises your reliability. Do you then go to the boss and ask for your resignation because he has only judged you to be reliable and not very reliable?

Verwenden Sie auch

© 2024 PIRKA® Wolfgang Smidt. The content provided on this website is protected by copyright. Any use requires the prior written consent of the author. The information and advice provided has been compiled to the best of our knowledge and carefully checked. However, it is no substitute for expert psychological and medical advice in individual cases.

Try it out!

PIRKA wishes you every success with the application.

Literature

Beck, T. & Freeman, A. (1993). Kognitive Therapie der Persönlichkeitsstörungen. Weinheim: Beltz.

De Jong-Meyer, R. (2000). Kognitive Verfahren nach Beck und Ellis. In Margraf, J. (Hrsg.), Lehrbuch der Verhaltenstherapie, Band 1. (S. 509-524). Berlin: Springer.

Fiedler, P. (2007). Persönlichkeitsstörungen. Weinheim: Beltz.

Hautzinger, M. (2011). Kognitives Neubenennen und Umstrukturieren. In Linden, M. & Hautzinger, M. (Hrsg.), Verhaltenstherapiemanual (S. 203-207). Berlin: Springer.

Mühlig, S. & Poldrack, A. (2011). Kognitive Therapieverfahren. In Wittchen, H.-U. & Hoyer, J. (Hrsg.), Klinische Psychologie & Psychotherapie. (S. 543-564). Heidelberg: Springer.

Ülsmann, D. & Ertle, A. (2017). Kognitive Umstrukturierung und Verhaltensexperimente. In Brakemeier, E.-L. & Jacobi, F. (Hrsg.), Verhaltenstherapie in der Praxis (S. 273-292). Weinheim: Beltz.